A couple of weeks ago, I overheard bits and pieces of a conversation between a couple of colleagues of mine while I stepped outside for some fresh air. One of the individuals, who I’ll refer to as “Jeff”, is a relatively low-ranking, operations-level employee who gets along well with just about everyone in the office and is always extremely well mannered. The other, who I’ll refer to as “Bryan”, is a little more brash, but because he’s a high-level executive, people tend to take his word as gospel and bend over backwards to appease him.
I honestly didn’t hear enough of their conversation to really get the gist of what they were discussing, but what caught me off guard was the following exchange:
Jeff: “Hey Bryan, do you have any idea when the new folks will be moving in?”
Bryan: “Yeah, well, I’ve heard a couple of different stories from people down there. You know how it is with those dumb***es.”
Jeff: “Jesus. Why can’t those ******* idiots ever manage to get their **** together? Is it really that difficult?”
Bryan: “Heh. Considering who it is we’re talking about, it probably is. I’ll see you Jeff.”
Wow. Remember that Jeff is the soft-spoken, cool-headed guy who I’ve never heard curse or complain in my entire life and now, all of the sudden, I catch him cussing like a sailor. Around Bryan of all people! What’s up with that? Had he gone mad?
Perhaps there is a time and place to be politically incorrect
Well, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. I’ve personally interacted with Bryan a number of times even though he is several levels of management above me and I tend to remain quiet, polite, and let him do most of the talking. It never really hit me until I overheard him and Jeff talking, but I’m almost certain that I’ve never made a memorable impression on him simply because our interactions have always been so mundane.
Jeff, on the other hand, was cursing up a storm and having a grand old time laughing and chatting it up with Bryan. They were like a couple of long-lost fraternity brothers who just ran into each other at a beer festival. I’m no psychologist, but I’d be willing to bet that kind of interaction is almost always going to be more memorable, as it helps to build a rapport that’s not always easy to establish with senior managers and executives.
As I pondered the situation further, I began to think that perhaps there really is a time and a place to push decency and angelic manners aside in favor of some mild crudeness. After all, business is all about risk taking and relationship building, so wouldn’t it make sense to stray from your comfort zone (or society’s comfort zone for that matter) every once in a while? I eventually concluded that like many things in life, it’s a bit of a gray area and it ultimately comes down to your goals and intentions.
A fine line
Unfortunately, there just isn’t a way to make a clear cut decision, one way or the other, as to when you should turn the “P.C.” on or off. Every situation and interaction is a completely different dynamic and your own motives, morals, and goals will have to guide you to the correct decision. Some people are going to be uncomfortable rubbing elbows with C-level executives who are a little rough around the edges, while others are going to do whatever it takes to get in their good graces.
Let’s hear your thoughts
If you’ve faced a similar situation or have an opinion on the matter, let’s hear about it in the comments below. I bet that this is one of the issues where we could really get a heated discussion going, so let’s hear it!
Image courtesy of tricky
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
You must learn to be a chameleon. Adapt to the situation. As long as you don’t cross your own moral boundries (i.e.-racist or misogynistic or…) then blending in and mirroring is crucial. Dale Carnagie once said “If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive”
Carpe Diem
Eric
Scrubbing the floor with your standards as a way of improving your lot in life actually seems to work for individuals focused on climbing the rungs to success.
The sad reality is that such individuals often move up the ladder and hold positions of control. And while they might “manage” people one day, these individuals will never actually “lead” anyone.
In time, amongst real leaders, their weaknesses, failures, and petticoat riding will become evident. The adaptive behavior that once allowed them to succeed, will actually lead to their professional demise.
“Scrubbing the floor with your standards”
What does this mean?
As much as I abhor rank and file behavior and suppressing your true personality at work, I agree with Benjamin’s comment.
There are times when I’ve tried to inject a little personality into the workplace with senior execs and it doesn’t play well. Sometimes you come off as a bit of a loose cannon (or perhaps it’s just my quirky personality), so you come to the conclusion that it’s best to play it safe in the workplace.
Most leaders look for politically correct, talented, serious minded individuals they can depend upon to drive people in a diplomatic fashion to efficiently get the job done without offending anyone. Period. Only if you conquer these initial qualities can you then safely consider somewhat politically incorrect behavior with others in the workplace.
Typically, it’s only when you are in a leadership position that you have the luxury of letting loose and adding your personal style and touch to situations at work. But the amount of personality you are able to safely inject into your workplace situations should only be equal to your level in the company.
That said, the older I get, the less I care about being politically correct. In my case, I have a “take me as I am” attitude while still focusing on doing a good job for the company which is providing my salary and benefits. It becomes a simple expectation of doing the job expected of me in exchange for the salary I expect from my employer.